Daddy…

picsssThere’s no where to start.

Mainly because it’s not over yet.

But we all know I process through words. And I’ll be d*nged if there isn’t more to process than I ever could have imagined. Let me start by saying this:

I have been given a glimpse of the Kingdom of Heaven.

Everywhere I turn someone is telling me they love me, they’re here for us, they are praying for my family, offering to help. Every minute I know my family is covered in prayer. Multiple times this week I’ve felt like I couldn’t continue. It was over. My Daddy was gone, I wouldn’t be able to continue. I don’t know how to do my taxes, I’ve never met someone who can hug me like him, I’m not married yet so who will walk me down the aisle? In the midst of God’s faithfulness, I’ve felt my faith failing. I’ve felt myself doubt promises of God’s goodness.

Do you know what kept me going? What kept my faith alive? What showed me GOD’S GLORY every second? You. The family of God. The kingdom. HIS people and HIS children showed me what it truly looks like to be a part of the church.

Worship, prayer, Jesus. How would I continue through the most difficult time I ever could have imagined experiencing without the King of Kings, Redeemer, Yahweh, Healer being on my side? When I feel like I’m on the losing side of the most important battle, I remember the General of MY army has already won.

He’s already won but this battle isn’t over.

Rewind.

It’s Sunday and my parents are in Siberia. I’m watching the house for them. I know my dad has been feeling a little under the weather but what else is new?

It’s Sunday afternoon. My mom is calling an ambulance for my dad in the middle of the night across the world. My sisters are with me and we are confused and scared but I KNOW he’s going to be okay. He has to be. My sisters leave to go to their respective houses.

It’s Sunday night. My sister come back. Our dad might die. We aren’t ready.

We think he has Meningitis or some other hard word that basically means his brain is swelling and infected. I believe he’s going to be okay but maybe we don’t know.

It’s later Sunday night. We realize it’s cerebral malaria. This doesn’t sound as scary but it is.

It’s Monday. We are surrounded by love. We are holed up in our home praying and worrying. My sisters are crying but I haven’t yet. If I cry, it’s real.

It’s Monday night. We go to our good friends’ Jessica and Levi’s house. It’s worse now. I still believe he’s going to be okay because he has to be. But the words being said around me go against this. “Critical,” “Dangerous,” “Alone,” “Die”…

picsThe rest of the week is a blur. Trying in vain to get him the only medicine that will cure him. It’s illegal in Russia. Trying to get him out. No one will take him, he’s too critical. Trying to talk to the doctors, they don’t speak English. We think we’ve secured him a way to Dubai. It falls through. A trip to Paris. It falls through. An ambulance. No ambulance. The doctor’s won’t release him. They won’t talk to Mommy. We have a trip to Paris but no way to get him to the plane. We have an ambulance but they don’t know what we are talking about the day of. My mom can’t get on the plane. Calls, emails, prayers, fighting.

Maybe it’s pointless.

But we fight. We fight because it’s not over and he deserves this fight. The coolest thing? THOUSANDS of other’s are fighting with us. Thousands are praying and holding us and calling people for us and getting us connections and translating and making us muffins and loving us and prophesying and fighting.

I can’t begin to thank everyone who has been there every step of the way. Bob, Clay, Adam, Emily, Sally, Cindy, Zoe, Amy, Kimberly, John, Eileen, Nena, Julie, Mark, Cat, Will, Kristin, Travis, Lori, Kim. I literally could keep going with tens of thousands of names but that would be a boring blog. Just know I could not be more thankful. My family is together, sane, and my dad is alive, because the Kingdom of God is STORMING heaven on our behalf.

But like I said, it’s not over. We are still worried about after effects. We are still scared. There’s still so much of a fight. I will probably make MANY more blogs about this event because this one barely scratches the surface. Like many of you said, we could write a book. Maybe we will. God’s glory is being shown in ways I’ve never imagined. God’s faithfulness is evident. I could (and probably will) make a whole post about little ways God was faithful and came through and prayers were answered.

The Kingdom is incredible. The King is perfect and good.

I’m exhausted. I’m scared. I cry a lot. I worry a lot. I’m selfish. But I’m so thankful I got to see what God is doing. And I’m so excited to see what else he’s going to do. And I’m excited that my dad will see it too, because I faith he will in Jesus’ name.

 

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6 thoughts on “Daddy…

  1. Thounsands and thousands of people are praying!!!! Thank you for sharing your heart! Patty Hendricks II took care of your grandamama 🙂

  2. Wonderful! Having lost both parents unexpectedly … I so get the emotional journey you were/are on. Lost my brother part time twin ( we are 101/2 months apart) two years to the day yesterday… I’m still trying to find my new normal and my faith has been tested, tried, stomped on, kicked you name it. BUT GOD showed up BIG in so many ways during the worst possible moments ;so I so get it!! Thank you for sharing. ntinue my prayers for you all.

  3. So beautifully written! Your daddy is proud of you. I believe we have the right to be selfish at times because we don’t want to imagine our lives without our parents. Your daddy is strong and so is your entire family. We are praying for you. I find myself checking Facebook frequently to check on updates. Thank you for taking the time to post updates.

  4. Pingback: In My Darkest Days | Escape With Me

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