τετέλεσται

palm.jpgTetelestai.

“It is Finished.”

Maybe it’s cliche to start a blog like that on Good Friday. Maybe it’s even a bit hypocritical when I literally forgot it was Good Friday until my cousin asked if BookClub was going to be open and I didn’t know why she was asking.

Maybe it is. Maybe I’m only writing this blog because I’ve been feeling frustrated at my stagnation and the lack of enthusiasm to post. Maybe I’m digging something out of my heart that’s not there so I can save face and put SOME sort of new content on this blog that only a handful of people read regularly.

Maybe I’m so stuck in my own head I forgot what it was like to exist in the world.

I want to feel like I have some sort of bigger, deeper purpose. I want to help people.  I want to make a difference. I want to stop feeling shame in my past life. I want to have incredible, mindblowing revelations about my King. I want to do better, be better, and move mountains.

I want to rest in the implications of the first word in this blog.

Tetelestai. τετέλεσται. It is Finished.

Arguably, the most important word, or words, in our language.

When Jesus had received the sour wine, he said, “It is finished,” and he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.

-John 19:30

Hundreds of years led up to this moment. Thousands of people looked forward to this fulfillment of dozens of prophecies and promises. Millions of lives would be changed because of this and what was to come.

Jesus leading a blameless life and dying a sinners death, a death the rest of us deserve, for humans, for you and I, and then rising again is the reason we have hope today. At this moment, when Jesus uttered those words, he was declaring the debt owed to His Father was wiped away completely and forever. He paid in full the debt we all owed for living horrible, sinful lives.

So why do I try to help Jesus save myself every day? Why am I beating myself up because I don’t have a job yet? Because I didn’t write a blog post for three weeks. Because I haven’t read my Bible today. Because I still feel so much crippling shame and doubt. Because I still question and struggle and fear. Why am I trying to help Jesus do what he finished on that cross?

He saved me. He gave me the chance to leave the darkness and walk in complete, fulfilling light. He ended the hold the enemy had on my life when he paid the debt I owed.

My fear is finished.

My shame is finished.

My guilt is finished.

My imperfections, worthlessness, struggles, sin. It’s DONE. Finished.

I don’t deserve this simple fact. I never will. I can’t earn it. I would never be able to pay in full the debt I owed.

But Jesus did it for me and I never have to earn it and never will deserve it, but I’ve been saved, redeemed, made new, and delivered anyway. Despite my little failures and struggles. Despite my uncertainty and imperfect faith,

It is STILL finished.

Tetelestai.

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