Dear Ex

zoeDear ex in my inbox,

The way I see it is there are three types of “inbox exs”.

  • The lonely inbox ex. He probably wants to hookup or even get back together. He realizes he lost something great and now regrets his life. He also can’t get any other girl to smile at him so he’s feeling small and lonely. It’s sad.
  • The angry inbox ex. He’s victimized himself, made you a “b*txh*, and told all his pickup truck friends that HE broke up with YOU. In his message, he makes use of all the curse words he’s learned in his however many years on earth and let all his “feminazi” frustration out on you. It’s also sad.
  • The apologetic inbox ex. He’s moved on, realized though you may have damaged his pride, he may also have hurt you. He has a new girlfriend but his conscience is keeping him up at night. He’s in your inbox to make amends. This one is no longer sad.

Which makes it all the more annoying.

In this letter, I’ll be referring to inbox ex #3.  Continue reading

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Dear Daddy

13495349_10206687025921083_6915098289535630100_nWhen I was a kid we played a game called “Lion”. You would chase us around while we laughed and hid, wanting you to catch us so that you would tickle us until we screamed. Then you would ‘die’, falling to the ground with a huff. 

We’d relish in the moment of victory for hot second before we decided we wanted Daddy to chase us some more. I would be always sent by my oh so loving older sisters to wake you up (by jumping over your legs if anyone was wondering).

This is one of my favorite memories.

Moments of laughter and joy, being a kid with my protecting, fun Daddy.  Continue reading

Dear next human getting married,

67954_10151378336943231_1220201761_nAlright first, I want to say congratulations. Mainly because I have to. People frown at you if you ignore the happy couple saying “I do”. I’m not sure why. People do it every day. Especially this season.

You know next weekend I literally have three weddings I’ve been invited to? Three. Do you realize how exhausting weddings are? I’d be dead before the third bride even walked down the aisle.

Dear bride, I know this is a big deal for you but I’m sorry the type of flower doesn’t matter nearly as much as you think it does. Also, no one likes wedding cake. They pretend to because they are supposed to but really, a good chocolate chip cookie would have been much better. Continue reading

Dear Professor,

profeliWait, what? No, seriously, what? Can you repeat that? Are you even speaking English right now?

“No. I’m your Spanish teacher.”

HAHA. That was funny. I did a funny thing to start this blog post. Mainly because I’m sleep deprived. So this is going to be rough.

Dear professor,

Could you work a little harder to spread out our work? I get that you just want to get the information across and then you realize you need grades for the class, but honestly, a week of papers, exams and quizzes is exhausting. I just spent a month doing nothing and all the sudden I can’t sleep for a week? Seriously. Continue reading

Dear Writers,

996165_4934805614743_232075109_n-1Your craft is so important. It is difficult and it is an art. We are so appreciative of it. Don’t let anyone tell you what you do is not important. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s easy or you’re not good enough or it will mean nothing. Because none of that is true. It means so much to us. Your work helps us get through hard times in our lives. It lets us know we are not alone. It entertains us and helps pass the time. It helps our imagination grow. It takes us to new worlds. It helps us see over the fence. It helps us fly and fight evil and live an epic romance or save the world. You put our thoughts on paper. You help us connect with people we may never meet. You make us smile, laugh, cry and yell. You build friendships and bring together families. You’re art is so important.

Continue reading