2020 LINGERS

“Trauma in a person, decontextualized over time, looks like personality.

Trauma in a family, decontextualized over time, looks like family traits.

Trauma in a people, decontextualized over time, looks like culture.”

-Resmaa Menakem

LOCKDOWN & QUARANTINE

Depression & Anxiety

The Office of National Statistics in the UK has found that rates of depression have doubled. Fatigue, anxiety, a lack of cues, and fewer social interactions all play into the rise of depression and anxiety.

A Look Inside an ADHD Mind

PART ONE: THE BASICS

ADHD isn’t a character flaw. It’s a developmental disorder of the brain. Some of the symptoms of adults with ADHD are:

• Trouble completing and organizing tasks
• Frequently losing important belongings
• Forgetfulness and distraction
• Restlessness and Impulsivity
• Difficulty following details
• Impatience
• Strong, sometimes inappropriate emotion
• Obsessive behaviors
• Poor memory

ADHD, anxiety, mood disorders, autism, and other conditions are not single or simple disorders.
They all have multiple types. ADD affects many areas of the brain and can manifest in many different ways.

Experts agree there are about 7 main types of ADHD.

Loving Those With Mental Illnesses

Beware of Spiritual Bypassing

SB is the use of spiritual ideas to avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and societal problems. Basically, it’s the use of religious words, theologies, or cliches to invalidate or avoid addressing the actual issue.

When spirituality and religion are used to compensate for challenging traits such as low self-esteem, social isolation, mental health issues, social issues like racism or sexism, or other emotional issues, they corrupt the actual use of the spiritual practice.

Some examples include:

• “It doesn’t matter who is president, Jesus is always in control.”
• “Everything happens for a reason.”
• “I don’t see color.” & “All Lives Matter.”
• “Try focusing on the positive!”
• “Don’t be anxious, just trust God!”
• “Rely on God and you won’t be so tired.”
• “You shouldn’t feel lonely. God is always with you.”
• “Have you prayed about it?”

Diagnosed

Please, for the love of all that is Netflix, don’t comment “Is this a surprise to anyone?” under this blog post.

Because, yes, yes it is a surprise to me. And it’s so frustrating that this took almost TWENTY-FOUR YEARS for someone to tell me.

Let’s backtrack.

Over a month ago, I went to a new therapist for the first time and asked her why I can’t remember half my life, why I have so much trouble following people who are talking to me, and why I focus better while playing a dumb, mindless game on my phone.

“Has anyone ever tested you for ADHD?”

Ari’s Best Friends

Her eyes glaze over, her chest shakes with laughter, she falls onto her back and her fingers rake against the glaring white ground.

It was 2008.

No… 2007.

2006?

It was a while ago when Ari first met her best friends.

She was five.

So it would have been 2006, right?

HERS.

Therapy. Doctors. Endless conversations. Even a hypnotist once.

“You’re in shock.” “You’ve experienced great tragedy and loss.” “Trauma plagues you every day.” “You need help.” “What you’ve experienced follows you every day.” “You’re demons will never leave you.” “Broken, you’re broken.”

Broken. Broken. Broken.

I don’t remember what it’s like to have a normal beating heart. Most people don’t think about it. The way your heart thumps in your chest. Most normal people don’t realize every pump of blood being surged through your body.